A Shell of My Former Self—If I’m Lucky

It just occurred to me, perhaps because I’ve been maundering about the mansion lately with more than my usual melancholy, to think upon the old phrase “a shell of her former self,” which of course is always said with a sorrowful shake of the head with a kind of doomy delectation. My maudlin state is only self-indulgent pity that will soon pass, as it’s clearly related to my recent bout of battling some sort of ugly internal germ warfare, and I am surely the patient for whom “im-” was coined as a prefix to the category. Why, I hate mooning around feeling like last week’s boiled cabbage even more than I hate getting up early in the morning or other forms of socially correct forced jollity, and that is definitely, in the vernacular, ‘going some.’

I’m quite willing to admit that my present case of strep throat, Black Plague, or common-head-cold-with-flashy-tendencies is not going to kill me, and that it will likely pass before I take up my unlicensed weapons and go rampaging. (You do not want to know what I might think of doing with a hot glue gun outside of my craft cupboard when I’m feeling cranky!) But this knowledge has in no way impeded my crotchety tendencies and air of martyrdom as I’ve slouched about the homestead.

Yet I will concede that a shell is not always the least of one’s components, so perhaps I can allow a certain latitude in my impatient-patient thinking. Maybe if I determine to think of the possibility that the homely exterior is not only armor for the meat of the matter, in a literal way, but possibly has its own beauties, too, I won’t so easily wallow in feeling hollow. I’m not going to produce any pearls out of my irritation, either of the nacreous kind or of wisdom, but perhaps if I can focus my scratchy, rheumy thoughts a little and work up my own little bit of shine somehow, all this grey-tinged groaning might become less pointless and frustrating after all.

Photo: A Shell of Her Former Self

I’m just feeling a little weak in the mussels at the moment. It’ll soon pass…

8 thoughts on “A Shell of My Former Self—If I’m Lucky

  1. Knowing that the “weak in the mussels” state will soon pass is a comfort, for sure…but it never helps quite as much as I think it should. Here’s hoping that you’re feeling better!

    • Finally caved and went to the doctor today. Pretty much just confirmation of my guesses, but at least making it official means I’ll now get medicated and maybe speed up the poky get-well thang. Phooey, I hate being the crabby old invalid. Really makes me feel I *am* invalid, if you know what I mean. 😀 Thanks for the good wishes! That alone makes me feel better than any medications.
      xoxo,
      K

  2. I applaud you for stretching your witty mussels (*snicker*), even when you feel icky. Usually we just want to curl up and hibernate, so you have to at least give yourself credit for extra effort. 🙂

    • It’s just possible that, like archy and mehitabel, my germs were putting up posts of their own whilst I was out of commission. One doesn’t always have as much control as one thinks, eh! Whether it was my work or something produced in such an extracurricular fashion, I’m pleased there was something to amuse you.
      xo

  3. Kathryn! As it turned out, I had to go to the doctor two weeks ago as I was feverishly bitten by a bug myself. Therefore, I know how rotten it is to feel wiped out. However, judging by this post, may I just say that the bug that bit you had not snatched away even a morsel of your iridescent SPARKS.

    Get and stay well. As I have said to myself daily for two weeks now, to no consistent success: take your meds.

    P.S. I fully realize that my punctuation marks are scattered all across the border between China and Amercia. I just don’t know how to herd them into a land of cohesion.

    • Thanks, Beautiful! It was so wonderful to have some time together today, especially knowing that it might be such a long stretch before we get another ladies-who-lunch break together. I am mighty glad we both got good doctoring and good meds so we could take advantage of the occasion in much improved health!

      You know that I am in awe of your command of English, never mind its being your second (third? ninety-third?) language—you just do great stuff with it. So I’m going to enjoy getting back to reading your *new* blog. Bet you’ll find all kinds of inspirations for posts on your upcoming adventures. So many big things ahead for us all, it seems!!

      Give the fur-babies a good hug from me, and I’ll look forward to news and photos when the chances arise.
      xoxo,
      Kathryn

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