I Loves Ya, Cupcake!
I kiss your cherry-colored lips
And suddenly, straight over flips
My heart in loping, loopy leaps
As sugared-up as Mallo Peeps
Get kids at Eastertime to fly,
As ice cream piled on apple pie
And candy canes in cocoa make
Our livers strain, gallbladders quake,
Arteries cringe and capillaries
Bloat, collapse, and the Tooth Fairy’s
Rounds expand a hundredfold
When molars instantly grow old.
You get my drift: one little kiss
Of your sweet lips can lead to this
Extreme, near-paralytic dose
Of dearness, loveliness, and close-
Encountered expiration date,
But loving you is surely fate,
My cupcake, my delicious sweet,
And death of it the final treat.
The Great Equalizer
Willowy or wallowing?
Slinky or obese?
Ma likes the taste of salad greens
And Pater thrives on grease.
What’s odd is, their cholesterol
And blood pressure and weight
Don’t seem to correspond at all
With anything they ate.
I can’t quite comprehend how one
Eats lard, the other, toast,
And both don’t change; I guess
Food matters little
To a ghost.